One of the more difficult parts of learning a language is what is a female item and what is a male item.  It’s important to know this as it makes a big difference in the sentence structure.  I’d always assumed that English was devoid of “this item is male, this item is female” until today …. and so, hot off the “intertubes”, where everything on the “net” has to be true right?

Male or Female?   

You might not have known this,

but a lot of non-living objects

are actually either male or female. 

Here are some examples:  

FREEZER BAGS: 
They are male, because they hold everything in, but you can see right through them.

PHOTOCOPIERS: 
These are female, because once turned off; it takes a while to warm them up again. They are an effective reproductive device if the right buttons are pushed, but can also wreak havoc if you push the wrong Buttons.

TIRES: 
Tires are male, because they go bald easily and are often over inflated.

HOT AIR BALLOONS: 
Also a male object, because to get them to go anywhere, you have to light a fire under their butt. 

SPONGES: 
These are female, because they are soft, squeezable and retain water.  

WEB PAGES: 
Female, because they’re constantly being looked at and frequently getting hit on.

TRAINS: 
Definitely male, because they always use the same old lines for picking up people.

HAMMERS: 
Male, because in the last 5000 years, they’ve hardly changed at all, and are occasionally handy to have around.

THE REMOTE CONTROL: 
Female. Ha! You probably thought it would be male, but                 consider this: It easily gives a man pleasure, he’d be lost without it, and while he doesn’t always know which buttons to push, he just keeps                 trying….