Category Archives: butt

Early Afternoon Thoughts ~ They’re Not Ignoble ~ Just Ig Nobel

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Next to the Darwin Awards (for those who mercifully remove themselves from the gene pool), I love the Ig Noble Awards.  Hosted by Improbable Research each year they award an Ig Nobel Award best described here :These come with little cash, but much cachet, and reward those research projects that ‘first make people laugh, and then make them think'” — Nature

I’m not totally sure about the thinking part, but the laugh part certainly is there.  This year’s awards include a variety of subjects … each seeming somewhat ridiculous.  I suppose there ARE those who need to know what happens when coffee sloshes when you walk, but right now I can’t think of anyone!!! Let me know if you do….

Envelope please ~ the 2012 winners of the coveted Ig Nobel (who  received their awards in an actual ceremony yesterday) are:

PSYCHOLOGY PRIZE: Anita Eerland and Rolf Zwaan [THE NETHERLANDS] and Tulio Guadalupe [PERU, RUSSIA, and THE NETHERLANDS] for their study “Leaning to the Left Makes the Eiffel Tower Seem Smaller”

PEACE PRIZE: The SKN Company [RUSSIA], for converting old Russian ammunition into new diamonds.

ACOUSTICS PRIZE: Kazutaka Kurihara and Koji Tsukada [JAPAN] for creating the SpeechJammer — a machine that disrupts a person’s speech, by making them hear their own spoken words at a very slight delay.

NEUROSCIENCE PRIZE: Craig Bennett, Abigail Baird, Michael Miller, and George Wolford [USA], for demonstrating that brain researchers, by using complicated instruments and simple statistics, can see meaningful brain activity anywhere — even in a dead salmon.

CHEMISTRY PRIZE: Johan Pettersson [SWEDEN and RWANDA]. for solving the puzzle of why, in certain houses in the town of Anderslöv, Sweden, people’s hair turned green.

PHYSICS PRIZE: Joseph Keller [USA], and Raymond Goldstein [USA and UK], Patrick Warren, and Robin Ball [UK], for calculating the balance of forces that shape and move the hair in a human ponytail.

FLUID DYNAMICS PRIZE: Rouslan Krechetnikov [USA, RUSSIA, CANADA] and Hans Mayer [USA] for studying the dynamics of liquid-sloshing, to learn what happens when a person walks while carrying a cup of coffee.

ANATOMY PRIZE: Frans de Waal [The Netherlands and USA] and Jennifer Pokorny [USA] for discovering that chimpanzees can identify other chimpanzees individually from seeing photographs of their rear ends.

MEDICINE PRIZE: Emmanuel Ben-Soussan and Michel Antonietti [FRANCE] for advising doctors who perform colonoscopies how to minimize the chance that their patients will explode. [OK, I just HAD to add to this one … REFERENCE: “Colonic Gas Explosion During Therapeutic Colonoscopy with Electrocautery,” Spiros D Ladas, George Karamanolis, Emmanuel Ben-Soussan, World Journal of Gastroenterology, vol. 13, no. 40, October 2007, pp. 5295–8.]

And there you have it … this year’s winners ….

Early Afternoon Thoughts ~ Male or Female

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One of the more difficult parts of learning a language is what is a female item and what is a male item.  It’s important to know this as it makes a big difference in the sentence structure.  I’d always assumed that English was devoid of “this item is male, this item is female” until today …. and so, hot off the “intertubes”, where everything on the “net” has to be true right?

Male or Female?   

You might not have known this,

but a lot of non-living objects

are actually either male or female. 

Here are some examples:  

FREEZER BAGS: 
They are male, because they hold everything in, but you can see right through them.

PHOTOCOPIERS: 
These are female, because once turned off; it takes a while to warm them up again. They are an effective reproductive device if the right buttons are pushed, but can also wreak havoc if you push the wrong Buttons.

TIRES: 
Tires are male, because they go bald easily and are often over inflated.

HOT AIR BALLOONS: 
Also a male object, because to get them to go anywhere, you have to light a fire under their butt. 

SPONGES: 
These are female, because they are soft, squeezable and retain water.  

WEB PAGES: 
Female, because they’re constantly being looked at and frequently getting hit on.

TRAINS: 
Definitely male, because they always use the same old lines for picking up people.

HAMMERS: 
Male, because in the last 5000 years, they’ve hardly changed at all, and are occasionally handy to have around.

THE REMOTE CONTROL: 
Female. Ha! You probably thought it would be male, but                 consider this: It easily gives a man pleasure, he’d be lost without it, and while he doesn’t always know which buttons to push, he just keeps                 trying….

Early Morning Thoughts ~

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Santa Sat on His Great Butt Enjoying a Hardy Brew

A beer distributor says Maine is being a Scrooge by barring it from selling a beer with a label depicting Santa Clause enjoying a pint of brew. The label for the English-made Santa’s Butt Winter Porter features a rear view of a beer-drinking Santa Claus sitting atop a barrel.
The beer’s name refers not only to Santa’s ample backside, but also to the barrel. In England, brewers once used a large barrel called a “butt” to store beer.
In a complaint filed in federal court, Shelton Brothers accuses the Maine Bureau of Liquor Enforcement of censorship for denying applications for labels for Santa’s Butt Winter Porter and two other beers it wants to sell in Maine.

Does this mean it’s acceptable to call someone a “horse’s (any other animal’s) butt” in polite conversation? Somehow horse’s beer barrel just doesn’t have the same ring. Does it?

Oh Radkappe Tannenbaum!
Oh Kraftfahrzeug Radkappe Tannenbaum

Here in the city there are always hubcaps along the sides of the road. There are some shops that collect them and resell them (with or without the car attached). But this Christmas season someone decided to collect them with a very different purpose.

All I can say is: You probably won’t see this on DIY network or Martha Stewart … althought it would be interesting to see what would be said during the program. “Now, Martha, while we wait for the crankshaft shaped fruitcake to cook, let’s take this crowbar and insert it right there on the hub cap of this car and ….”