Category Archives: maintenance man

Pop, Lock and Drop ~ Early Evening Thoughts

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I will be the first to admit it ~ well, actually I don’t admit it to very many people. I am no good with locks. I had admitted in a previous post that the very first lock I drilled (to force it open) I made such a mess of it we had to kick the door in to get it open. It would be wonderful to say that things have improved since then, but a couple of recent events have convinced me that is not the case.

Recently, there was a problem with someone who was doing certain maintenance who had a habit of walking off with the keys to various storage rooms at the various properties. Normally, this would not be a problem as they usually are quite quickly returned ~ especially after an irate phone call from a manager to the maintenance person. Unfortunately, in this case, the maintenance person appeared to be walking off with more than just the keys. Now, I’m faced with a padlock that can’t be cut off with bolt cutters and a boiler in the storage room that needs some attention. I don’t know about anyone else, but I don’t and never have enjoyed cold showers. I’ve discovered that my tenants don’t care to take them either.

That shouldn’t be a problem. I have a drill, the necessary drill bits and my wonderful expertise in drilling a lock. What I was never told ~ padlocks drill differently than ordinary locks. VERY differently. In an ordinary door lock/dead bolt there is a “sweet spot” on the lock that can be drilled and the lock will magically open…for everyone except myself. If someone has a diagram of that spot, I would appreciate a copy of it. I’m convinced that each lock has it’s own spot and only maintenance people know where that spot is.

The spot on a padlock is different ~ dead center evidently. I started up the drill ~ thought better of it, and called our handy maintenance man who was working at a different property. I’ve got drill in hand, lock in sight and cell phone to the ear. “Be careful,” I hear him say, “not to drill too far in or you’ll never get it open.” I found that very hard to believe. I got ready to drill. The involved putting down the phone as I had to hold the padlock in my hand while drilling. The mental image forming is probably very accurate.

I start in and have this sudden vision of having to be taken to the hospital with a drill bit through my hand, arm or other appendage. Maintenance had told me not to drill too far ~ I was really convinced that I really didn’t want to drill at all. I will admit it, having to hold the padlock while I drilled made me feel similar to a magician’s assistant on a board while he hurled knives at me .

Bracing myself ~ for what I wasn’t sure ~ I again took the lock in one hand, and drill in the other. At the moment I started to drill, the phone rang. Using any excuse to put down the lock and drill, I answered it. The maintenance man was about five minutes away and wanted to know how I was doing. I tried to be quite nonchalant about it all ~ but he knows me. “Would you like me to come and drill it for you”, was a statement I was not about to turn down. He arrived and actually talked me through the process. Yes, I held the lock and I drilled the lock and the lock did open. OK, I have to admit something: I found out (about half way through the lock) that there is a way to not have to hold the lock while drilling.

The boiler problem was quickly solved ~ and hot water was forthcoming. Maintenance went on his way (minus the key) and a new shiny lock laughed at me from the storeroom door.

—more lock tales to follow

And Then They Arrived ~ Early Evening Thoughts

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It would be nice to be managing a larger complex, I decided on Wednesday. My frustration level was almost at optimum, and I was waiting for maintenance to happen. Most large complexes have their own dedicated (to the complex ~ I won’t deal with how dedicated to work they are!) people that are supposed to accomplish miracles in a short space of time.

I had been waiting for some not-so-minor things to be accomplished. Waiting, waiting, waiting. It was much as the furniture story I posted the other day. This time, however, there were no fingernails to chew…they were gone. There was no one to yell at ~ well, no one who was part of the solution to the problem anyway.

Finally, I pulled in the “big gun” and made a phone call. To who will remain behind a discretionary curtain – but needless to say, help was promised within the hour. Now, we all know how that can go ~ one hour stretches into three or four and then into a day. I was prepared. Within the hour, as I was standing outside getting some air…a truck pulled up and it was reminiscent of a cop movie. Four burly guys flew out of the truck, one charged up to me ~ put out his hand. He shook mine in a vice-like grip, asked what needed to be done now and as I was stammering my response (yes, my hand hurt!) they were off on their missions.

I have since dubbed these folks my personal SWAT team. They accomplished in two hours (!!) what had not been accomplished in two days. I would have done a victory dance, but was afraid I’d fall in the bushes or the street ~ so I admirably restrained myself.

Today they were put to the test. I had three drains in three apartments that were backing up and overflowing…not a good sign. The SWAT team were dealing with issues at three complexes, but assured me they would be here today to get more magic done.

I should have simply trusted them – but … so, when they weren’t here in the morning, I started trying to find out what was going on. It’s not as if there weren’t other things that needed attention, but I was getting some/most/a little of those done as the day went on its merry pace.

It was now afternoon. And one of my more delightful (sort-of) tenants was coming into the office at increasingly shorter intervals to let me know that 1) no one had arrived yet and 2) the water was still backing up and 3) to give me a running tally of how many “buckets” he had taken from the sink and dumped in the toilet.

Of course, there were the usual phone calls, tenants and prospective tenants sandwiched in around getting paper work done (remember, in a weekly rental apartment I do everything I had a month to do before in 5 days…and then get the privilege of doing it all over again the next week!).

Finally, I was making phone calls at increasingly shorter intervals to find out what ~ if anything ~ was going to happen.

4:14pm came around and my SWAT team arrived…this time with only three members. There was the same exit from the truck as before, the same bone crunching handshake … and they piled into the work. And by the time I left for awhile at the end of my day, they had accomplished all they set out to do, and all that I needed them to do. A good feeling.

Now, I’m not sure what the tenant is going to do tomorrow without a reason to come in and give me reports ~ but perhaps (given his …ahem…advanced age…more than mine) he’ll spend the day recovering.

As for me? Tomorrow brings new challenges, ideas and keeping up with what needs to be done.

I don’t get the SWAT team back until Wednesday ~ but that is alright, as I can rest comfortably in the knowledge they will be here and will get things accomplished!!

Maybe I better watch out – they might start doing my job as well … Now that’s a thought ~

–I’m still unable to publish pictures … hopefully in the next few days …

Sunday, Sunday – Oh, That Sunday Sleep ~ Early Evening Thoughts

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I really needed a silly time today. For the most part, the day went fairly well … OK, the day went. It started with 1/2 of the couple moving into the apartment today (my day off!) told me that the move would start at 8:00am in the morning. Yawning and complaining, I awoke at 7:00am to be somewhat ready for their arrival.

At 8:00am I received a phone call from the OTHER 1/2 of the couple saying it wasn’t going to happen until 10:00am. Not a problem, back to bed I went. THEN I received a phone call from the first 1/2 of the couple saying it was now going to be around 11:00am before it happened. I didn’t bother to get out of bed.

I finally emerged from what some people call a beauty sleep (didn’t work in my case!) and started my day. Finally at 3:00pm the first load arrived of the move. That was when disaster seemed to strike. The electricity was off ~ OK, not a problem. I would just go back and flip the switches. OK~ now a problem.

Last night my maintenance man decided to get in the middle of an argument that a man and woman were having out on the street. Unfortunately, it appears that neither of them appreciated his becoming involved and he ended up being smacked down onto the pavement. Of course, there was the requisite head gash and being slightly banged up. The head gash made him look as if he had been run over and being banged up made him slightly irritable and not feel very well.

While the police were not too terribly interested in going after the arguing couple, the ambulance folk were very interested in taking my maintenance man on a ride to the hospital. I didn’t argue ~ too much.

Unfortunately, the maintenance man had the electrical box keys attached to his belt. OK ~ no problem, the man and the keys will be back today. OK ~ now a problem, he evidently was kept overnight for observation and testing. I still have not heard from him nor from anyone that knows him.

Now, I have two halves of this couple (who may or may NOT communicate with each other) moving into an apartment that has no electricity. Thank heavens for petty cash. I’m going to offer them either dinner and breakfast in the morning or a Motel 6 room for the night. They can take their choice ~ but they are NOT allowed to call me with the decision. I can only imagine how many phone calls that would take!!!

I’m also hopeful that I can get down to the Comcast office this week, and get my Internet hooked back up. The problem isn’t Comcast or me. The person who lived in this apartment before me left without paying his bill (and it is a him as I know who it is!). I have to go down and prove that I am not this nefarious bill skipping …uh… person. At that point, I will no longer be using the office computer and will be able to post pictures on the blog once more!!

And now, for the silly part of my Sunday:

One of the most incredible marketing campaigns involved Marlboro cigarettes. On the side of each pack were “miles” and people collected those miles for prizes from the prize catalogue. This helped Marlboro stay ahead of the “pack” which advertising that cigarettes could do became quite limited.

Here are some little known items from the various years catalogues:

1. 1,000,000 miles: John Wayne’s bronzed lungs

2. 80,000 miles: The “Cougher”: “cough”– Lights on… “cough”-“cough”– lights off!

3. 80,000 miles: Marlboro Man ballet shoes and tutu

4. 100 miles: Bumper sticker saying, “You can have my cigarette when you pry it from my feeble, trembling hands.

5. 500,000 miles and a $10,000 contribution: The Senator of your choice

6. 25,000 miles: (collectors item) Jackie Gleason’s “Wheezin’ to the Oldies” workout video

7. 45,000 miles: Complete framed collection of Surgeon General’s warning labels

I drove past a Hollywood Video Store this week, and they were eliminating all the VHS tapes from the store at $1.99 each…at least that’s what the sign outside said. As the world moves more to CD’s and DVD’s … I got to thinking about that wonderful (now becoming a collectors item) invention the floppie disk that seemed so revolutionary at the time. I was sure I hadn’t lost it ~ and today I dug around in a couple of the “don’t throw this away, I might need it someday” boxes I have in the closet, and there it was.

Proper Care of Floppies

1. Never leave diskettes in the disk drive, as data can leak out of the disk and corrode the inner mechanics of the drive. Diskettes should be rolled up and stored in pencil holders.

2. Diskettes should be cleaned and waxed once a week. Microscopic metal particles can be removed by waving a powerful magnet over the surface of the disk. Any stubborn metallic shavings can be removed with scouring powder and soap. When waxing diskettes, make sure application is even. This will allow the diskettes to spin faster, resulting in better access time.

3. Do not fold diskettes unless they do not fit in the drive. “Big” diskettes may be folded and used in “little” disk drives.

4. Never insert a disk into the drive upside down. The data can fall off the surface of the disk and jam the intricate mechanics of the drive.

5. Diskettes cannot be backed up by running them through the Xerox machine. If your data is going to need to be backed up, simply insert two diskettes together into the drive. Whenever you update a document, the data will be recorded on both diskettes.

6. Diskettes should not be inserted into or removed from the drive while the red light is flashing. Doing so could result in smeared or possibly unreadable text. Occasionally the red light continues to flash in what is known as a “hung” or “hooked” state. If your system is “hooking” you, you will probably need to insert a few coins before being allowed to access the disk drive.

7. If your diskette is full and you need more storage space, remove the disk from the drive and shake vigorously for two minutes. This will pack the data enough (Data Compression) to allow for more storage. Be sure to cover all the openings with scotch tape to prevent loss of data.

8. Data access time can be greatly improved by cutting more holes in the diskette jacket. This will provide more simultaneous access points to the disk.

9. Diskettes can be used as coasters for beverage glasses, provided they have been properly waxed beforehand. Be sure to wipe the diskettes dry before inserting into drive (see item #2 above.)

10. Never use scissors and glue to manually edit documents. The data stored is much too small to be seen with the naked eye, and you may end up with data from some other document stuck in the middle of your document. Razor blades and scotch tape may be used, provided the user is equipped with an electron microscope.

11. Periodically spray diskettes with insecticide to prevent system bugs from spreading.

And of course, no day would be complete
(also from the same box) without some quotes to end the day:

He who dies with the most toys, is, nonetheless, still dead.
–unknown

The cost of living hasn’t affected its popularity.
–unknown

I am returning this otherwise good typing paper to you because someone has printed gibberish all over it and put your name at the top.
–English Professor, Ohio University

Q: How many surrealists does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: Two. One to hold the giraffe and the other to fill the bathtub with brightly colored machine tools.
–unknown

Q: How many minimalists does it take to change a light bulb? A: 1
–unknown

This is not a novel to be tossed aside lightly. It should be thrown with great force.
–Dorothy Parker

Diplomacy is the art of saying “nice doggy” until you can find a rock.
–unknown

When the only tool you own is a hammer, every problem begins to resemble a nail. –Abraham Maslow