And For What Might Seem To Be Small Change ~ Early Evening Thoughts.

Several months ago (has it really been that long?), I wrote –>about Kiva.org.<– ~ a micro-lending organization that makes loans possible to people who would never otherwise qualify for loans.

For as little as $25 ($27.50 actually if you add $2.50 to help defray operating expenses!) you can reach someone and help turn their lives around in a way that helps them operate as a business should. These people are not the recipients of a grant or gift (although there is nothing wrong with that) but rather they have to go through a loan process and then when enough people have loaned them money to reach their goal, the money is made available to them. The best part, is that they are expected to pay the loan back.

When the loan is paid back, the original investment made is returned to the lender … who can take the money or reinvest it in someone else.

One of the investments I made was with a woman by the name of –>Selima<–. Her business required expansion and she needed ten sheep and sixty chickens. I want to report (proudly I might add) that she has begun to repay the loan. She has 14 months to repay the investment a number of people made, but I have a feeling she will repay it much earlier than 14 months.

I was reminded of a story about a very wealthy businessman during the depression. He passed by what we would call a beggar with a tin cup and a few pencils in the cup ~ if someone wanted to take them. The businessman reached in his pocket and threw two nickles in the cup and started to walk away…he stopped, turned around and went back.

He said to the beggar, “I’m sorry, I treated you unfairly. It is obvious you are businessman, and that you have pencils for sale. I would like my pencils, please.” He held out his hand, and the rather startled beggar put two pencils in the mans hand.

Sometime later, the businessman needed some stationary for his office and while returning from lunch, he noticed a small shop. He went in, and picked out what he needed and went to the register to pay. The man behind the register called him by name, and then said:

“You won’t remember me, but sometime ago I had no belief in anything as I had lost everything. I was reduced to begging in the train station. You walked by and believed in me enough to call me a businessman and to make me complete a business transaction. I started believing in myself again. This shop is a result, and my stationary business has been good enough that I’m going to move to a different, larger location in the next few months.”

The point being, we can make changes in peoples lives and help them become businessmen and women.

Several blogs have done articles about micro-lending overseas, and it’s something worth looking into and you can make a difference for what might seem to be small change.

I hope you will seriously consider becoming a lender to the poor. Here’s the –>link to the website<– where you can learn much more!

You Too Can Be A Lender To The Poor (news) ~ Thoughts

Several weeks ago, I wrote about becoming a micro-lender to people overseas who would not qualify for loans through normal channels. Yesterday, a major blog site (other than mine ~ of course!) Trend Hunter did an article on micro-lending in general in Kiva specifically. (full article –>here<–)

Why donate when you can empower? Kiva.org lets you loan money directly to an entrepreneur in the developing world. Specifically, the online site connects you to a network of entrepreneurs through local microfinance organizations. So far, Kiva has hooked up over $6 million in loans to more than 60,000 entrepreneurs.

For example, Agnes Lawer (shown) is an entrepreneur in Ghana seeking a $900 loan to develop her bead manufacturing business. She plans to repay her loan in 9-12 months. You could loan her the $900 directly, or a portion.

The Kiva site describes, “Kiva lets you connect with and loan money to unique small businesses in the developing world. By choosing a business on Kiva.org, you can “sponsor a business” and help the world’s working poor make great strides towards economic independence. Throughout the course of the loan (usually 6-12 months), you can receive email journal updates from the business you’ve sponsored. As loans are repaid, you get your loan money back.
We partner with organizations all over the world.”

Kiva ROCKS.

I also understand (although I’m still trying to confirm this) that Charles Gibson also did a piece on the news tonight on the subject.

But – remember, you saw it here before they did!!!!

Dark Matter In Space and Life(coda) ~ Early Moring Thoughts

As I had talked about “I” messages, and mentioned the use of what I was calling “directed” questions to try and effect change in someone ~ what I had not counted on was someone taking far more direct action. I had written that SE chose to believe that 1) things would always work against whatever was wanted, 2) that nothing could/would go the way they wanted and 3) anger is/was the only way to deal with the what was happening.

Earlier in the day SE had decided to “put someone in their place.” Unfortunately, the person being “put in place” made a very quick decision that was not something they were going to tolerate. SE had a very abrupt realization that there could be pain attached to taking anger out on someone ~ very abrupt and very painful.

You will not be punished for your anger, you will be punished by your anger.
–Buddha

Holding on to anger is like grasping a hot coal with the intent of throwing it at someone else; you are the one who gets burned.
–Buddha

I have spent a long time with SE today, which limited my on-line time. However, I can say – there was a positive result of it all, and I’ll return to the topic tomorrow night. (And SE has agreed that outside help is needed with the issues ~ which is one of the major results I wanted.)

Dark Matter In Space And Life ~ Early Morning Thoughts

During the last three weeks, I have been dealing with something that has begun to really wear on me. There is someone that I have come to care/be concerned about very deeply that has made/is making choices that could possibly tear their life apart even more than it already is. This caused me to go back over a couple of posts that I did earlier about self-fulfilling prophecy and choices (I am a self-fulfilling prophecy and self-fulfilling anger).

Once again, there are quotes that laced those posts:

You will not be punished for your anger, you will be punished by your anger.
–Buddha

Holding on to anger is like grasping a hot coal with the intent of throwing it at someone else; you are the one who gets burned.
–Buddha

This person chose/chooses to believe that 1) things would always work against them, 2) that nothing could/would go their way and 3) anger is/was the only way to deal with the what was happening.

This is NOT saying that anger doesn’t have purpose and uses. When anger is held onto, nurtured and allowed to color everything, that it can override what is actually going on in life. Someone once compared our emotions to an investment. They can either pay dividends or they can be held onto until they become a liability causing a drain of all that can be healthy. And, unfortunately, holding on to that kind of anger hurts rather than helps. It can become not only foolish, but actually self-destructive.

Anger, someone once said, is valuable only as a short-term investment. It’s value sharply decreases the long it’s held onto. It also consumes a tremendous amount of energy – physical, emotional and spiritual.

However, here is where I’m standing at the moment. Exactly how can someone be told what the bitter anger, resentments and “persecution” is doing to them and to those around. How can you show someone – who can not see the examples around them – that things can and should be different.

—more on this tomorrow

–Blue Anger – http://www.jamiehulleyartsfund.org/art/blue.htm

You, Too, Can Be A Banker To The Poor ~ An Update

On March 28th I wrote about Kiva, an organization that makes micro loans to ordinary people overseas that needed small loans for their businesses. I had decided that I would do three loans of $25 each. The first loan has been paid out to:


I apologize for the quality of the screen shot – I’ll try to get a better one.

Basically, she has had this business for 10 years. She breeds chickens, ducks and turkeys. She needed to buy 10 sheep and 60 chickens.

With a number of other investors she now has received the funds to expand her business.

For more information visit http://www.kiva.org.

You, Too, Can Be A Banker To The Poor ~ Early Morning Thoughts

I decided that I wanted to expand on this original post from earlier this evening. I just couldn’t get the idea out of my head. When I was growing up my parents were very giving to many people – some who had no idea where the “help” had come from. I enjoy helping in any way I can. When I had nothing a short time ago, it was amazing where help started coming from.

I had read about the concept of micro-lending to ordinary people overseas. The statistics of pay-back for instance have been phenomenal. Most of the micro-loans are paid back. As in, the 95+ percent range. I then ran across this article which shows how anyone can make a difference for as little as $25 dollars at at time. Nicholas D. Kristof wrote this article for the New York Times and also put it on his blog. I must have read it a dozen times – getting more intrigued and excited each time. After I post the original recap, I went to the Kiva site and have now decided where I am going to “lend” some money. I’ll post more information on that Tuesday or Wednesday.

As a “lender” there will be some expectation of being repaid. However, as a “lender” I have to realized that the business might fail … but that’s part of sharing in this unique way. There is another website that accepts donations, but I decided that I liked the Kiva approach – much more business-like.


Welcome to Pottersville: Nicholas D. Kristof: You, Too, Can Be a Banker to the Poor

KABUL, Afghanistan

For those readers who ask me what they can do to help fight poverty, one option is to sit down at your computer and become a microfinancier.

That’s what I did recently. From my laptop in New York, I lent $25 each to the owner of a TV repair shop in Afghanistan, a baker in Afghanistan, and a single mother running a clothing shop in the Dominican Republic. I did this through http://www.kiva.org, a Web site that provides information about entrepreneurs in poor countries — their photos, loan proposals and credit history — and allows people to make direct loans to them.

So on my arrival here in Afghanistan, I visited my new business partners to see how they were doing.

On a muddy street in Kabul, Abdul Satar, a bushy-bearded man of 64, was sitting in the window of his bakery selling loaves for 12 cents each. He was astonished when I introduced myself as his banker, but he allowed me to analyze his business plan by sampling his bread: It was delicious.

Mr. Abdul Satar had borrowed a total of $425 from a variety of lenders on Kiva.org, who besides me included Nathan in San Francisco, David in Rochester, N.Y., Sarah in Waltham, Mass., Nate in Fort Collins, Colo.; Cindy in Houston, and “Emily’s family” in Santa Barbara, Calif.

With the loan, Mr. Abdul Satar opened a second bakery nearby, with four employees, and he now benefits from economies of scale when he buys flour and firewood for his oven. “If you come back in 10 years, maybe I will have six more bakeries,” he said.

Mr. Abdul Satar said he didn’t know what the Internet was, and he had certainly never been online. But Kiva works with a local lender affiliated with Mercy Corps, and that group finds borrowers and vets them.

The local group, Ariana Financial Services, has only Afghan employees and is run by Storai Sadat, a dynamic young woman who was in her second year of medical school when the Taliban came to power and ended education for women. She ended up working for Mercy Corps and becoming a first-rate financier; some day she may take over Citigroup.

“Being a finance person is better than being a doctor,” Ms. Sadat said. “You can cure the whole family, not just one person. And it’s good medicine — you can see them get better day by day.”

Small loans to entrepreneurs are now widely recognized as an important tool against poverty. Muhammad Yunus won the Nobel Peace Prize last year for his pioneering work with microfinance in Bangladesh.

In poor countries, commercial money lenders routinely charge interest rates of several hundred percent per year. Thus people tend to borrow for health emergencies rather than to finance a new business. And partly because poor people tend to have no access to banks, they also often can’t save money securely.

Microfinance institutions typically focusing on lending to women, to give them more status and more opportunities. Ms. Sadat’s group does lend mostly to women, but it’s been difficult to connect some female borrowers with donors on Kiva — because many Afghans would be horrified at the thought of taking a woman’s photograph, let alone posting on the Internet.

My other partner in Kabul is Abdul Saboor, who runs a small TV repair business. He used the loan to open a second shop, employing two people, and to increase his inventory of spare parts. “I used to have to go to the market every day to buy parts,” he said, adding that it was a two-and-a-half-hour round trip. “Now I go once every two weeks.”

Web sites like Kiva are useful partly because they connect the donor directly to the beneficiary, without going through a bureaucratic and expensive layer of aid groups in between. Another terrific Web site in this area is http://www.globalgiving.com, which connects donors to would-be recipients. The main difference is that GlobalGiving is for donations, while Kiva is for loans.

A young American couple, Matthew and Jessica Flannery, founded Kiva after they worked in Africa and realized that a major impediment to economic development was the unavailability of credit at any reasonable cost.

“I believe the real solutions to poverty alleviation hinge on bringing capitalism and business to areas where there wasn’t business or where it wasn’t efficient,” Mr. Flannery said. He added: “This doesn’t have to be charity. You can partner with someone who’s halfway around the world.”

Here is the link to read the entire blog post: Welcome to Pottersville –

And here is the link to Kiva: www.kiva.org

I have decided that I am going to lend $25 dollars to three businesses. I won’t be as fortunate at Mr. Kristof and be able to travel to see each business, but just knowing I have had a part will be wonderful!

Anyone else up for some grass roots banking?

"But They Made Me…"(continued) ~ Early Morning Thoughts

Little did I know when I posted early Sunday morning that I would have a couple of personal experiences to use for this post. I was to spend the day with D&D – a simple brunch, visiting an (overpriced) antique shop, and perhaps a not-so-gentle libation to complete the day.

D&D provided a delightful brunch and we headed off to window shop the antiques. The shop was packed with much to see – and a few things to try and avoid. My knees are not in the greatest shape, so the ability to sit down occasionally is regarded as a blessing. The chairs that were NOT for sitting had delightful piles of “stuff” on them. After having been wandering around (and suppressing gasps at some of the prices), I noticed two chairs of the fairly sturdy kind along a division. As I lowered myself into the chair, the arm literally snapped off in my hand. There is nothing like sitting in an antique chair with the antique arm off the chair and now in my antique hand.

No one made any derogatory comments concerning the incident – but it roiled inside me. I walked outside and thought about what had occurred and my reaction to it. Of course there was the embarrassment and no small amount to shame – but what really surprised me were the old “tapes” that began to instantly play in my head. Reminders of what had occurred before, and what words had been ingrained in me…that I thought I had replaced over time.

The words we live with can become something quite serious – The word CAN become the “thing.” When I would hear the word “clumsy” I allowed that word to become the thing (me) and therefore I was clumsy. When the joke used to be made that I could trip on the seam of linoleum, I allowed those words to become the thing (me) and began to feel that everything I did had to live up to that label. By allowing the word to become the thing, I unconsciously began to look to incidents that backed up my feeling. Of course, the word was NOT the thing, but to me it was. By attaching power to words, I gave that word control. That control drove what I did, felt and created.

Words are not the thing they represent. What they are ~ representations of something. When I was growing up I became clumsy because I felt that word was what I WAS. What was happening; I had mapped out a territory and I was following the map.

Here’s a fun party game (especially after a couple of drinks!). Hand your guests a piece of paper and have them map out in detail how to get from where they are sitting to their cars. They have to map out direction, the number of steps, the doors to open (and how those doors open), etc.. They give their map to someone else to follow exactly as written. (it helps to have a prize, by the way.) So if the map says “6 steps to the 1st door” and the steps actually require 10 steps, the map is invalid.

When I took on the “map of clumsiness” as my personal territory, I kept running into parts of the map that were completely inaccurate. Of course, it was easier to blame the territory rather than the map. It became easy to place the blame externally rather than looking inwardly to see what needed to be changed.

After posting Sunday night, I decided that I needed to fix my browser bookmarks. I’m not even going to admit how many there were/are. As I was moving and eliminating, with one keystroke, I completely eliminated a valuable (to me) collection of places. While my reaction included some very unprintable and in a couple of cases physically impossible reactions – it also included some chuckling. In the past, an incident such as this would have completed the map I had of my territory. I would have used words such as “idiot,” “dummy,” and others. They would not have been just an indication of irritation (!?), but would have been an indication of just how I felt about myself. It would not have been an unfortunate “goof,” it would have settled to me what I was, and how I felt about myself. My innacurate map would have matched the territory – and to me the territory would have been safe and complete.

more on this tomorrow

Watch your thoughts, for they become words.
Choose your words, for they become actions.
Understand your actions, for they become habits.
Study your habits, for they will become your character.
Develop your character, for it becomes your destiny.
–Anonymous

Early Morning Thoughts ~ Choice Thoughts

Continuing yesterday morning’s post on choice,
here are some other peoples thoughts:


George Eliot:
The strongest principle of growth lies in human choice.

Denis Waitley:
There are two primary choices in life; to accept conditions as they exist, or accept the responsibility for changing them.

John Wayne:
Tomorrow is the most important thing in life. Comes into us at midnight very clean. It’s perfect when it arrives and puts itself in our hands. It hopes we’ve learned something from yesterday.

Kahlil Gibran:
We choose our joys and sorrows long before we experience them.

Frank Swinnerton:
We would rather be in the company of somebody we like than in the company of the most superior being of our acquaintance.

Leo Buscaglia:
What we call the secret of happiness is no more a secret than our willingness to choose life.

Edgar A. Guest:
You are the person who has to decide. Whether you’ll do it or toss it aside; you are the person who makes up your mind. Whether you’ll lead or will linger behind. Whether you’ll try for the goal that’s afar. Or just be contented to stay where you are.

Gene Roddenberry:
A man either lives life as it happens to him, meets it head-on and licks it, or he turns his back on it and starts to wither away.

William Jennings Bryan:
Destiny is not a matter of chance, it is a matter of choice; it is not a thing to be waited for, it is a thing to be achieved.

Aristotle:
For what is the best choice, for each individual is the highest it is possible for him to achieve.

Jim Rohn:
Happiness is not by chance, but by choice.

Wayne Dyer:
Heaven on earth is a choice you must make, not a place we must find.

Neil Peart:
If you choose not to decide, you still have made a choice.

Liz Carpenter:
Instead of looking at life as a narrowing funnel, we can see it ever widening to choose the things we want to do, to take the wisdom we’ve learned and create something.

Napoleon Hill:
It is always your next move.

Jean Nidetch:
It’s choice – not chance – that determines your destiny.

Frederick Bailes:
Man’s power of choice enables him to think like an angel or a devil, a king or a slave. Whatever he chooses, mind will create and manifest.

Oprah Winfrey:
Right now you are one choice away from a new beginning – one that leads you toward becoming the fullest human being you can be.

If
by Rudyard Kipling

If you can keep your head when all about you
Are losing theirs and blaming it on you;
If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you,
But make allowance for their doubting too;
If you can wait and not be tired by waiting,
Or, being lied about, don’t deal in lies,
Or, being hated, don’t give way to hating,
And yet don’t look too good, nor talk too wise;

If you can dream – and not make dreams your master;
If you can think – and not make thoughts your aim;
If you can meet with triumph and disaster
And treat those two imposters just the same;
If you can bear to hear the truth you’ve spoken
Twisted by knaves to make a trap for fools,
Or watch the things you gave your life to broken,
And stoop and build ’em up with worn out tools;


If you can make one heap of all your winnings
And risk it on one turn of pitch-and-toss,
And lose, and start again at your beginnings
And never breath a word about your loss;
If you can force your heart and nerve and sinew
To serve your turn long after they are gone,
And so hold on when there is nothing in you
Except the Will which says to them: “Hold on”;

If you can talk with crowds and keep your virtue,
Or walk with kings – nor lose the common touch;
If neither foes nor loving friends can hurt you;
If all men count with you, but none too much;
If you can fill the unforgiving minute
With sixty seconds’ worth of distance run –
Yours is the Earth and everything that’s in it,
And – which is more – you’ll be a Man my son!

Early Morning Thoughts ~ Poison to Medicine (finale)

The spiritual journey does not consist in arriving at a new destination
where a person gains what he did not have
or becomes what he is not.
It consists in the dissipation of one’s own ignorance concerning one’s self and life
and the gradual growth of that understanding which begins the spiritual awakening.
The finding of God is a coming to one’s self.
– Aldous Huxley

When I started the several threads leading to this one, I knew that I had no choice but to be honest, open and forth-coming. For some, perhaps, that honesty was a little TMI (too much information). Others might have felt they intruded on something that should have remained private. But in order to get here I had to go there. It was important to show what I’d learned in order to share with some kind of reality and truth.

That same dayn(several years ago) I called my boss and asked him to come see me at the apartment. When he arrived I told him basically everything that had happened and what had been going on. I fully expected to be fired. He thought for a moment, and then made a comment that has stayed with me. “To me, this as if you told me you had cancer – or some other disease. We need to work with you until you are back to who you are.”

There was one of the major keys: I had to get hold of the Aldous Huxley quote that I’ve been posting over and over .. I wasn’t going to have to gain what I didn’t already have or become something I wasn’t already. I had within me what I needed – as do you. What I needed to do was find it. It wasn’t a case of “cleaning-up” and becoming something or someone else, it was a case of getting back to who I was – becoming who I was. I didn’t have lose myself in the process – I was going to find myself.

In simple terms, I had been trying to change myself. I had become a chameleon – changing to match the background, foreground – or any ground that anyone wanted me to be. This, of course, was particularly true with ZZ as I wanted something that actually wasn’t there and would never be there. (I know, never say never – but in this case …) I used to tell people that were having problems at work that in effect, the company has “rented” your behavior for the time you are there. Perhaps you’re a great opera singer with an excellent voice. The company you are working for is a library and you are the librarian. While you are at work, belting out major arias would not only be disruptive, but would probably get you fired. So, you adopt the librarian behavior at work. That does not mean you have changed – or become what you are not. You are being paid for that behavior. Where I went wrong, was I had changed my entire focus into changing what I was – rather than adapting to the situation as it really was, seeing it for what it was.

Now perhaps you think I’m advocating dishonesty. Not in the least. What I am
advocating is honesty in relationship, with self and with those around. Was there honesty in the relationship with ZZ? Basically no, it was based on an untruth on both sides. And I fell into the trap of trying to make something work that dishonesty had doomed from the beginning. And in the process had tried to doom me as well.

The hope that is within each of us needs to be based on who we ARE not what people think we need to be. And as I became more content with who I am, people saw me and can see the me I want them to see. Of course, as in the librarian example, there are times of adaptation. But it’s an adaptation, not an attempt at a life style or fantasy.

So, the poison became the medicine and I’m on my life journey to where I want to be … where I need to be.

Remember you’ve got a choice.
When you feel you can’t handle something,
you can either choose to feel miserable and helpless,
or maybe put your life in someone else’s hands to sort out – if they can be bothered.
Or you can decide to take charge ,
take full responsibility for whatever is happening,
even if none of it seems to be your fault,
and decide to turn poison into medicine.
– Geoff from the book, “The Buddha, Geoff and Me

Honesty plant painting by Roger Beckwaith ww.btintnernet.com

Early Morning Thoughts ~ Truth or ? (part 5)

When I started this journey with truth, I really hadn’t thought about other connections it might have. But when I decided that I wanted to have my childlike enthusiasm back it led directly to how I choose to deal with truth. After all, children live authentically, seldom afraid or embarrassed to seek out what they want or to speak their minds, unless they have been taught to fear or feel embarrassed to speak their truth.

Of course, as we grow older, we are taught to put that authenticity/enthusiasm away and adapt to what is considered to be “normal” to society. This isn’t a discussion about social graces or manners or integrity or ethics. What I’m talking about is the truth of who I am truly am – the characteristics, behaviors, passions and visions that are uniquely me . . . the true inner me. Without the masks of necessity, the hiding and lurking that living in society requires to function

This is motivating me to begin to be who I truly am and to discover my full potential. And to learn to work within the world around me without abandoning my authentic self. I may not speak my opinions or passions, but that doesn’t change the fact that I possess them.

It is very important that youthful authenticity and truth make up the qualities that help make me who I truly am. This is the true self – living authentically – . . . making time for things I love, enjoy and project who I am. It does require at times leaving the expectations of others behind and moving toward what I feel is the most worthwhile.

I need to become self-focused in a healthy way, doing what you know is best for you, regardless of the opinions of others – even the opinions of close friends and family. Living authentically means that I begin to make choices without fear, trusting in my soul’s wisdom. Denying my unique truth can lead to feelings of failure and dissatisfaction because I am no longer acknowledging your true self. In living in truth, there are no pretenses. Everything I do will reflect the choices I make. That in itself is a MAJOR challenge.

When I am unsure who the authentic me truly is, I need again to look inward and ask myself the same question I ask my friend with the serious illness: “Where am I?” This mean I need to look again at what my purpose, values, and needs are. I need to honor my strengths and try not to fall into the trap of being guided by what others expect of you. It’s a journey that is going to allow me to rediscover my passions of new things, and sticking with those things that stir my soul. I found a quote that I absolutely love:

If you bring forth what is within you, what you bring forth will save you. If you do not bring forth what is within you, what you do not bring forth will destroy you.

The Gospel of St. Thomas Logian

However – don’t think I’m going to let you off the hook!(again, watch out friends)

Unless you are willing to look into yourself, you will miss the opportunity to know the real you—a life spent, not in living, but in keeping your feelings, desires and dreams at bay. If you look into yourself, you will confront your own, ‘enemy in the jungle.’ Unless you actively seek personal change through the hard work of introspection, you will, to some degree, have lived a non-authentic life and have been, to some degree, only a shadow of your true self. This, then, is your greatest personal tragedy.

And last, for this post, Let me leave you with a quote that I have been dealing with for several days. It really is an amazing challenge/caution.

The essential aims of life are present naturally in every person. In everyone there is some longing for humanity’s rightful dignity, for moral integrity, for free expression of being and a sense of transcendence over the world of existence. Yet, at the same time, each person is capable, to a greater or lesser degree, of coming to terms with living within the lie. Each person somehow succumbs to a profane trivialization of his or her inherent humanity, and to utilitarianism. In everyone there is some willingness to merge with the anonymous crowd and to flow comfortably along with it down the river of pseudo-life. This is much more than a simple conflict between two identities. It is something far worse: it is a challenge to the very notion of identity itself.

Vaclav Havel, “The Power of the Powerless